Continued from Fig. 1.
Anyone growing up in a Western society is brought up to think that prostitution is horrible. But when I started my job, I discovered the reality is far from that, and definitely more complex, especially because there are two (at least) parties involved. I knew my side of the deal, but my clients’ side was a mystery at first, with plenty of material to work on – if you are interested. And I was.
Many clients think they pay for sex, but more often than not they pay for a dream. Once they bought it, all I have to do is listen and learn (I’m a great believer in learning from the mistakes others made without having to make them myself), and then I try to arrange the received information neatly into some sort of system. And from time to time there will be a client like John – usually a professional client who has seen many sex workers – who tries to file his experience into folders. My male analogue.
So why did you start this job?
At least he acknowledged that it’s a job, although this then makes the question redundant. Why do we all start this or that job? Because those of us who are not listed in Forbes have to actually go out and make money.
The right question is why I stayed. I tried starting a “decent life with an honest job”. The problem with these two is not only long working hours and peanuts in return, but also lack of motivation. See, when you work 9 to 5, you’ll be paid at the end of the month. Some see it as security – something good. But no matter how well you work, you’ll receive the same amount of peanuts at the end of each month. Does this make you work harder? Don’t know about others, but HELL NO is my answer. In my current career I do my bloody best to make sure I’ve done a good job. It starts with advertising and usually doesn’t finish when I close a client’s hotel room door as I leave – because I’ve just worked very hard to make sure he wants to see me again, so I do my best to commit this date to memory. Because if I don’t do my best at any stage, then I don’t get paid (in colourful pieces of paper, by the way, not in monkey food or spare change).
And the reward is not only financial. My emotional satisfaction is just as important, and in no other job (and I’ve had a lot of these since I started working at 16) have I been made to feel so appreciated and indispensable. Not to mention so beautiful. Prostitution rules.
How important is sex outside the relationship?
I can’t even, honestly. Let’s say it should be “How important is a relationship?” Well, not that much, otherwise I’d be sure to buy myself a couple of these. And since I’m not in a relationship, any sex I have is just sex. But if I WERE in a relationship, we’d be talking about 2 different types of sex:
- Sex I have at work. This sex is very important. Not because it’s sex or because it’s outside the relationship, but because it’s my job, it made me who I am, and provides me with a lot of potential for personal and financial growth. Without it I’d be a different person.
- Actual sex outside the imagined relationship. This most probably wouldn’t happen. Not because I get enough sex at work, but because thanks to my work I’m clever enough to not tie myself to a partner who makes me want to have sex outside the relationship. And if I were to end up in such a relationship (everything is temporary, including the Sun, people change and so do relationships), I wouldn’t hesitate to leave it. A hooker is the last person to stick around a useless partner because she has nowhere else to go.
You like challenging men, don’t you?
Well this is fresh. I suppose I love giving some of my clients a hard time – those who I think can take it – and John got his fair share. But he also commented on my website being challenging, and I’ve never thought of it in this light. When I put my site together, my aim was to make sure it attracts the type of client I’m interested in, who also finds my personality attractive. If you think this is challenging…